He's gone

GrandDad passed away this morning at about 10:35am. I still can't believe that I'll never hold his huge hand again. He'll never give me a big hug and say, "oh,oh, oh" when I rub his back. He'll never tell me I'm the prettiest little girl in the world or tell me that I'm his favortie granddaughter-in-law (I'm his only one, but it still made me feel special). He will surely be missed, but I know he is in a place now where he doesn't have any pain, memory loss, or struggle. Most of all, he isn't old anymore. Working with the elderly ladies that I care for, I have realized (as much as a young person can) how hard it is to get old. I am glad he doesn't have to deal with that anymore. My reasons for wishing he was still alive are purely selfish. I want him to be alive so I can hug him one more time. Not the way I hugged him at the hospice. That already wasn't the same. I will just have to remember the hugs we used to have (the ones where he sometimes almost knocked me over. He was huge!) and never forget what a wonderful person he was.
We love you GrandDad,
Sarah*